DICKFACE OF THE YEAR AWARD

Jarvis here...

Wow, our first day as a blog and already someone has won the Dickface of the Year Award. TJ Simers: Dickface of the Year. Congrats, dickface.

Read this.

I usually reserve Marty Noble as my punching bag. So plump & full of chicken fingers. But it's almost as if a fat sports writer Jesus looked down upon me and plopped this sloppy west coast butterball right onto my dinner plate. I mean, seriously, TJ Simers, who the FUCK do you think you are? Well, here's what the internet thinks you are:

A bully.

A small dick wimp.

A D-bag.

A fat obnoxious piece of shit.

I agree on all accounts. And now my mission is clear. Sure...Noble, Heyman, Lennon, Rubin, Martino, McCullough...they're all dipshit assholes. But TJ (fat sports writer named TJ? I don't even need to post a picture of this guy. Because come on, you already know what he looks like), TJ is my new Noble. The West Coast Noble. I'm coming for you TJ. There will be no plate of chicken fingers to comfort you once I find you. Fuck you. Fuck your ugly ass homely wife. And fuck your whore poor unfortunate daughters. You don't wield power, you wield fat greasy fingers. And you're gonna burn, piggy.

-Jarvis O'Dell